Poems about patients, poverty and medicine.
I began writing poems during medical school. I have written over a hundred but only fifty are included in this book. Most of them are about patients, poverty and medicine - some have been shaped by my volunteer experiences in Haiti - and all of them serve as a personal reminder.
It is my hope that by sharing my poems I can raise awareness about the continued suffering of Haitians, and hopefully garner some financial support for those NGOs providing crucial medical care in Haiti.
Additionally I hope to encourage others to utilize their talents and contribute their time on a daily basis to such causes that do vital and life saving work (and not just during anniversaries of horrible events such as the 2010 earthquake in Haiti).
This book by itself means nothing if all of us do not make a sustained effort to try to undo inaction against atrocities affecting so many vulnerable people in Haiti, and in many other parts of the world.
Varun Verma, MD
December 8, 2011
New York City
VarunVermaMD@gmail.com
http://www.undoinaction.com
Select Poems
UNDONE
The tears of the poor never fall freely- Burn like acid into their cheek. A hungry stomach is never comforted by- Knowledge that nothing changes. One does not get used to despair. They pray and look towards heaven- Only to be met with droughts. Misery though, showers down upon them. Sadness hails down in buckets and- Fear strikes like lightning at hearts. There are no foreign saviors - Some loot under guise. There are no answers from outside- Many puzzling tragedies at home. Something does arise from amidst the chaos. God. Hope. Love. Naivety? Tape will not mend these souls. Nor will philosophy, nor theology, nor promises. Will we stand by them, or will we turn our backs and look towards a more perfect landscape? PLAGUES Reemerging diseases are not, Not emerging. TB, Malaria, Diarrhea, Starvation. Devastating the masses- Only in places that we don’t turn. New world plagues are, Pandemic. Greed, Complacence, Indifference. Photo-shop out our sins. We deny them and tag our little triumphs. The free market illusion- Tycoons coddled by comforts of protectionism, Terrors of capitalism, igniting the indigent. Protest is encouraged anywhere but in our backyard. Make certain you have a permit. Lest you like the wrath of market-hired goons. 27 750 Blessed and cursed at once? Million dollar smiles, not a cent to their name. Past and future, simultaneous heaven and hell. Blood and sweat- No food though. Some dirty water. Plenty of diarrhea. Mosquitoes Misguided Maladies. Crushes hopes, Sliced spirits, Amputated dreams. The first world has no meaning here. This century’s marvels kissing last century’s plagues… Awkwardly. Can we love our neighbors- When we universally act neglectful? THE CLINIC My concrete kingdom drowns people huddle inside as roads become moats Water is pure lifting the dirt from the surface but not our injustices Outside- the broken bodies of the homeless mix with tattered bits of garbage I walk through soaked thankful though for momentary breath and the view DIABETES Forty years of four hundred pounds- Smiling nervously, Eyes open and ahead- But staring blankly. Immobilized in a chair with wheels, Dependent for food, water and toileting Darkness poured over her world, Since both of her eyes bled. Loving family though… Urine stopped flowing last week, Her kidneys had given out. Dialysis we speak to her about- Or death as we all know it truly is. Her mind intact, as her sacred body ruined. Miraculous cures, Wondrous recoveries, The marvels of modern medicine- None for her. The posters of prevention were correct, However neglected the obvious- Education, Economics, And horrible cycles of misfortune. BROKEN I once walked past a string of scattered umbrellas in the rain Their necks broken Like the souls of the homeless Neglected and untended Sitting with signs in front of their feet They may as well be ghosts People see them, but ignore them like scotomas People encounter them, but are scared People grant them change, but assume the worst Excel at ascribing blame- Alcohol and drugs, violence, crime, poor decisions. How about just dumb luck? Like the rest of life. PARTNERS Week-long missions to rebuild, like unicorns pretty and a myth. A revolution not a resurfacing, required for that which has been neglected for an eternity. Teaching a man how to fish is nice, So long as you don't poison the ocean. Providing infant formula for two weeks is noble, Better though if we don't betray the parents. Tears mixed with sweat equal the forgotten sorrows of many. Tragedy, or just the trajectory of our material existence? MEMOIRS 27 years of talent pierced by a bullet crushed by a fall stolen by infection Parameters are stable no mental status though Food is given, sadly no taste Eyes open and look about staring blankly at my face Chest moves up and down this heart will never love again All that is salvaged is what exactly? MY FIRST PATIENT She looked up but only for a moment - I won't be here next month Naïve - I question, If not here then where? I won't be here next month - but they still will She proceeds - everyday I pray, And everyday I hear silence The others they are fortunate I had a life once But not so much now I sit in malls, I sit in parks, I sit upon cars I watch, I wait, I pray. But not hope Hope is a cruel memory because - Nothing will ever change this First there was denial - Then fell out the hair, once upon a time My family they were so great Once- But not so much now My sisters whom I loved - turned their backs The one that stayed - more harsh than my mother She barks and orders I fight and scream - now no-one is around After that there is my ritual I sit and watch and wait and pray Sob and then nervously laugh - Everyday I eat Some days I taste the food Most of the day I look out and wonder why - I won't be here next month But the others will |
Preface (from the book)
I am not a poet.
After studying economics as an undergraduate I went on to become a medical doctor. While in medical school and during my training I wrote these poems as a personal remembrance of my patients. I have always been immensely saddened by how death extinguishes the experiences accumulated during a lifetime. Through my poems I hope to share some stories so that my patients may live beyond my thoughts. Poverty steals life also. These poems are more than elegy, they are an attempt to bear witness to the struggles of many, and not just my patients. Those of us lucky enough to easily obtain food, shelter and healthcare – at some point realize that the modern world has failed to provide safety, dignity and hope to billions. The ignored masses are all around us, such as in parts of my adopted hometown, New York City, where healthcare is in ruins and homelessness rampant. They are even more numerous in horrific places where survival is a moment-to-moment struggle. Haiti epitomizes this tragedy. It was no trivial task to survive in Haiti prior to the events of January 12th 2010, and it certainly has not become any easier since the lens of the media has drifted from the earthquake. Of course Haiti is but one place where humans are increasingly endangered. It holds a special place in my conscience because I have been privileged enough to volunteer in post-earthquake Port-Au-Prince with two different organizations. Sadly though (and quite obviously) there are other humanitarian disasters throughout the world affecting innumerable people. Given such overwhelming suffering in the world, we all face a personal challenge to stop indifference from becoming a convenient escape from our responsibility toward others. Thankfully, there are those who endlessly fight for change in corners of the world where the cries of many would be otherwise neglected. Living in New York City has allowed me the privilege of being surrounded by such passionate people across many disciplines – who pour their resources, energy and talent into reversing injustices. Similarly, during my trips to Haiti, Ghana and India I have been fortunate to cross paths with local people who join in solidarity to help each other in any way possible, rather than stand by as idle witnesses, or do the seemingly more rational thing and flee. This holds true in acute times of turmoil but also during the chronic struggles of life. Every single day ordinary people decide to take a stand and endeavor for others, whether for neighbors or for strangers across oceans. Such revolutionaries continually inspire me and I hope to emulate their action and work alongside them in the future. Indifference does not always stem from cruelty. Most people in our interdependent modern world want to do things for the benefit of others. Often we are hindered by bureaucracy, sometimes we do not know which avenue to take, and at times we may simply be too burdened with our own problems to act. The ultimate purpose of this book is to serve as a catalyst – I hope to connect with people who wish to make an effort to move beyond watching inspiring YouTube videos or TED talks, or clicking “like” buttons, or simply feeling bad for the world (all things that I have perfected). We all have something to offer, and we should push each other to foster it and bring it into fruition off-line and in the real world. We don’t have to be millionaires, CEOs or celebrities – simply being concerned citizens that are relentless in our pursuit will lead to lasting impact. The only question is what will our contribution be, and will we continue to honor it aside from the anniversaries of horrible events, and also once the media focus has shifted? I sincerely believe that together we can strive to truly undo inaction. This book is not for sale. As my own first step to move away from passivity, I will gift this collection to anyone who makes a donation to any humanitarian organization working in Haiti. Please email me your donation receipt and your address so that I can mail the book to you. Want the book?
The book is free.
I am requesting that you make a small donation to any of the humanitarian organizations working in Haiti. I have volunteered with Project Medishare and Haiti Medical Missions of Memphis. To donate directly to either organization please follow the links below (they will email you a tax deductible receipt) Send me your US mailing address to varunvermamd@gmail.com and I will mail you a paperback edition – I only have a limited number of copies because I had to pay for publishing costs myself. Another option is to get the ebook version from Amazon for only $0.99 -kindle reader is free on any computer system/mobile device (click the Amazon link below). Or I can email you a PDF. 
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